Harwich Hurricane Planner

We have two maps from FEMA to check out today. The map above is a Hurricane Inundation map, and it depicts storm surge from a direct hit hurricane visiting Harwich at mean high tide. It also shows what sort of storm would be needed to soak certain regions, which we'll get to in a minute.

The map is from the combined efforts of FEMA, MEMA, NOAA and the NHC. They use the funny-weatherman-titled SLOSH model of storm surge estimation. They do not depict freshwater flooding.

The colors relate to the Saffir-Simpson scale of hurricane intensity, and break down like this:

Light Green = Category 1 hurricane. Hurricane Gloria was one of these, and the offshore Halloween Gale was, too. Although not a tropical system, the Blizzard of '78 did Cat. 1-style damage.

Dark Green = Category 2 hurricane. Hurricane Bob was one of these.

Yellow = Category 3 hurricane. We've only had five of these hit New England since the Other Man arrived in 1620, the most recent being Hurricane Carol in 1954.

Pink = Category 4 hurricane. We've had one in recorded New England history, and it struck in 1635.

Flesh = One Hundred Year FEMA Food Zone. This is the "100 year storm" you hear people speak of, but you have to go pre-Colombian to find them ("going pre-Colombian" means using salt marsh soil samples to look for sand layering associated with large hurricanes). New England has had storms in the Category 4+ level in the 1100s, the 1300s, and the 1400s.

Sorry about Flesh, but my knowledge of color names was and continues to be heavily influenced by whoever was in charge at Crayola in the 1970s.

We shall leave the street-by-street analysis to the reader, who can use the links I'll throw in at the end of the article to zoom in on their own house if it suits them.

Note that you don't need to be in a shaded area to get yourself a quick and sudden Ending. You can have a tree fall on you, have your car washed out in street flooding, step on a downed power line, get purged by looters, enjoy the Robespierre treatment from flying shingles, be summarily executed by National Guardsmen, or even stumble into a sharknado. There's no shortage of ways for you to get Left.

With that in mind, we now present to you the down-there-somewhere Evacuation Zone map.

Remember, you don't HAVE to leave when 5-0 tells you to. Also remember that the cop you read the Constitution to before the storm may be the one who has to fish you out of the drink when the ship hits the fan.

The E-map is easier to read, as it is made up of only two colors.

Red = Get Out.

Yellow = Get the f*** out.

Hurricane Inundation Maps

Evacuation Maps

Worst Hurricanes To Hit New England

List of all hurricanes to hit New England

FEMA

MEMA

NOAA

NHC

A Visit To Billingsgate Farm In Plympton

from the Billingsgate Farm website

Let it be known that we favor certain local establishments in our reading area. You'll notice this as the column spills out over the years.

We regularly visit Mann Farms in Buzzards Bay, which is the source of most of our cranberry pictures. The fact that it is across the street from my neighborhood helps things along.

When I make tea for extended writing sessions, I use nothing in it but local honey made by Jenny Dee's Bees. I need to convince Jenny to bottle her honey in little plastic squeezy-bears, but that will only just improve something that is already awesome.

When I need farm stand stuff, I go to Billingsgate Farm in Plympton.

Very few and perhaps not any Shanghai tweens were injured by sweatshop drill presses making this pumpkin.

A lot of people buy their produce and even their pumpkins from Wal-Mart, and that's all well and good. We all wander into Wally now and then.

However, if doing so means that you drive by a local farm where you can take the pumpkin off the vine yourself, you're makig a great and terrible mistake.

Almost all Americans were farmers once, and the ones who weren't were almost toddler-dependent upon those who were. Times change, and we went from an agricultural nation to an industrial nation to a service economy. Farming, and the farmland, shrank away from the norm.

 Many and perhaps most Americans might not even know a farmer these days. That's a mistake, and it's one you can rectify for your family by pulling into somewhere like Billingsgate Farm.

"Massachusetts" isn't what comes to mind when you talk farms, but we have people out there putting in work. 

Your local farm stand will fill many of your culinary needs. Have no doubt that one of the important people to know during the proverbial Zombie Apocalypse would be a farmer. I'd be dead as soon as the last Pop-Tarts went bad, personally.

Not the farmer. Old McDonald, if he had enough kids and enough guns, could hold out just fine if the ship hit the fan. Well, at least he wouldn't starve.

In a more realistic scenario, we can remember the words of, uhm, somebody (editor's note: William Jennings Bryan):

"The great cities rest upon our broad and fertile prairies. Burn down your cities and leave our farms, and your cities will spring up again as if by magic; but destroy our farms, and grass will grow in the streets of every city in the country."

You can't speak more plainly than that, player...

How do you like them apples?

It is also Ground Zero for any Halloween shopping.

Remember, Halloween is at least tied to ancient Harvest Festivals. For most of human history, communities lived or died with the quality of their harvest. You can base a pretty good short story around people who are willing to kill to see to a good harvest.

Shirley Jackson's masterpiece wouldn't work at the Market Basket, and would only work in allegory at Wal-Mart. Linus, to my knowledge, wasn't waiting for the Great Pumpkin in the parking lot at the Winn-Dixie, or however they spell that.

Linus knows enough to go right to the source. He's in a pumpkin patch. Why go anywhere else, especially some big Eastern corporation?

I may be wrong (I was born in Dorchester), but I think this is a pumpkin blossom before it gets big.

You can also get other important Halloween stuff at a farm stand. They have corn stalks, Indian corn, hay bales, and whatever else you may need.

You don't grow Mouthwash or Ceiling Fans at local farms, so I can understand why you might go to a Wal-Mart for things like that. Society is good like that, they congregate stuff you need near wherever you may be needing it.

However, if you drive by the actual Harvest to go to something with asphalt around it to get the stuff for your home's harvest season look, you're just fooling yourself... no matter what you tell yourself.

Places like Billingsgate Farm get superpowers at Halloween, too.

Sally won't come home with dirty knees from this pumpkin patch, at least in theory...

Take the whole Fam Damily down to a farm stand AT LEAST to get a pumpkin. Walking around the perimeter of a farm to get your pumpkin beats down getting one out of a box at the Target.

You'll notice that you can get them out of a big box if you really want to. Either that, or those boxes are going to whoever will be marking them up before you buy them. Why pay a middleman?

Besides, farmers often go to great lengths to get people to support their local farms. Billingsgate farm becomes a sort of low-key theme park during the harvest season.

Even before you get out of the car, you're surrounded by pumpkins and gourds of all sorts. Never underestimate how cool that is in a society that is largely suburban and urban.

Tremendous for Jack-o-Lanterns.

Billingsgate Farm goes all-in during the harvest season. Here's what this little farm is offering the community:

- A Corn Maze. They should leave it open after Halloween during blizzards for families that wish to re-enact the climax of The Shining. The GPS feature where you can find your way out of the Billingsgate Farm maze would have most likely made things end better for Jack Nicholson.

- The aforementioned pumpkin patch. If "aforementioned" doesn't mean whatever part of the story we had the pumpkin patch in, well, you know what we mean.

- A food and picnic area, if you want to stretch the trip out. You never go wrong eating right from the farm, player.

- Don't forget the Hay Rides!

Hay, Hay Hay...

Maze Hours & Admission

Be prepared to get lost on a fantastic adventure. Inside our 3-acre Maize Quest® Corn Maze, you will find twisting pathways, questions and answers, and picture rubbings. It’s a maze, it’s a game, it’s educational, and it’s FUN!

General Admission
TICKET PRICES:
Adults (13yrs and older)…………………………………….$10.95/person
Youth (3-12yrs)………………………………………………$9.95/child

> Click here to sign up for our mailing list and get $1 OFF regular admission

Discounted Prices:
Senior Citizen (65yrs and older)……………………………$8.95/person
Police/Military………………………………………………$8.95/person
Girl Scouts………………………………………………….$2 OFF admission
Bradford Inn & Suites Guests………………………………$2 OFF admission

Children 2 years and under are FREE with a paying adult
All youths must be accompanied by an adult – no exceptions!
Note: Last tickets are sold 1 hour before closing

All attractions are included in the maze admission except refreshments, pumpkins, and items at the farm stand.

Corn stalks are essential to proper Halloween decorating.

ADDITIONAL OPTIONS:
Pumpkins……………………………………………………Priced per pound

GROUPS
Visit our Groups page for discounted rates and info for groups of 15 or more.

2015 Corn Maze Operation Season & Hours
Billingsgate Corn Maze & Farm Attractions are open in the fall September 19th through November 1st.

Open Weekends Only !
Saturday & Sunday 10AM – 6PM

Groups of 15 or more may book during the week with advance registration.

Flashlight Nights (Extended Hours)
Come try our maze in the dark for a different twist – but be sure to bring a flashlight in case you “get lost”!

October 17, 2015: Open 6PM – 9PM
October 24, 2015: Open 6PM – 9PM

Special Events/Holidays
Monday, October 12th – Columbus Day (10AM – 6PM)
Sunday, November 1, 2015 – Dog Days at the Maze (10AM – 6PM) – Bring your dog to the maze!

Rules
No Alcohol allowed anywhere on the farm
Do not run in the maze.
Do not smoke in the maze.
Do not break the ribbon.
Do not cut through the corn.
Do not pick the corn.
Do not use foul language.
No pets are permitted in the maze

Learn more at Billingsgate Farm.com

Well, What's This...?

Tropical Storm Joaquin To Hit New England?

We're keeping en eye on a system in the western Atlantic. 

Several forecasting models run it up the coast at us as a tropical depression or a weak tropical storm. The official NHC forecast takes it out to sea without it impacting any land masses. As it moves closer to us, it will meet some shear and some less-than-bathwater sea temperatures, and that will lessen her impact.

If it did become a tropical storm, and if nothing else forms in the Atlantic before it does, it will be Joaquin. If Joaquin happens somewhere else (and I hope it does, I pronounce Joaquin poorly), our storm would be Kate.

This isn't Katrina or anything, so don't panic. It could rain like hell, and there may be some minor-to-moderate coastal flooding at the beaches. It could also get very breezy. As with any storm, the forecast could change wildly in 12 hours, so keep yourself updated.

We'll have the whole CCM team mobilized if any cool pictures come out of it.

NHC

Skeetobiteweather

The Supermoon Over Duxbury

Our Duxbury Beach photographer, Sara, takes a few cracks at the Supermoon.

Duxbury Beach is a great place to take photos, and the effect is only heightened with a Supermoon.

As you know, a Supermoon is a full (or new) moon happening while the moon is at her closest point in the orbit to us. It appears 16% larger,and 30% brighter.

There is also a Micromoon, known as what I think is spelled apogee-szgyzy. That is when the moon is full at her greatest distance in the orbit from us,and it makes for a sucky pic.

Why we have Sara.... this is what happens when Steve shoots at the Supermoon. He lacks any appreciable skill sets.

... and this is what we get when he plays with the photo-edit software.

Cape Cod Canal Fog

Good Morning, Cape Cod!

Early morning folk know that the Cape Cod Canal, on spring and autumn mornings, often develops her own little Fog River.

There isn't a puff of fog anywhere else in town right now.

I wasn't the only shutterbug around, but I'm savvy enough to not bother the fishermen.

This fog will be gone soon enough, but it's a beautiful show this morning, at least while it lasts.

If you read this right as I post it, come on down and walk in a cloud.

Only on the Canal this morning can you shoot directly at the sun.

At least one person asked me if there was a wildfire burning somewhere. Indiana plates.... shakes head.

I can't imagine how you'd pilot a boat in that. Dead reckoning sounds too ominous.

I love fog, I'd like part of the town to be like this all day.

There is a striper tournament on the Cape this weekend, and you know that a few of them wandered down to the Canal for some morning casts.

They most likely parked their cars on Sandwich Road in unlimited visibility, cut through the woods, and ended up in a film noir scene.

I had to hop around on the Sagamore Bridge for some of these, so be appreciative.

Yes, should have hopped off, I get it, very funny.

I shot this over Route 6 on the Sagamore siply by holding the camera over my head and hoping I got lucky with the clicking.

It may do this tomorrow as well, with the added bonus of a Supermoon descent.

Have a good day, folks! Go Pats!

Scallop Festival Blues

Fiendishly Foisted Food Fest!  

Last weekend brought us the annual Scallop Festival, with all of the prestige and revenue that accompanies it. It really is nice to see our old friend return to... What do you mean, not Bourne???

The people who run the Scallop Festival- the Cape Cod Chamber of Commerce- decided that the event needed a larger venue, and shifted it to the Barnstable County Fairgrounds. The move gives the festival more parking, better facilities, and dare I say a more prestigious locale. The event has swollen in popularity, to the point where it draws in 50,000 people every time they throw it. A larger facility means the chance of more money. It makes perfect sense to move the event off the mainland.

Bourne's claim to the Festival had a fingertip grip at best, buffeted by hopes of a new hotel complex, the arrival of the Commuter Rail, and the revival of the Main Street business district. There was also a nostalgia/historic basis, but that isn't worth a few thousand parking spots these days.

The move also gave a stomach punch to a struggling village, a village that has stood by the Festival for her whole existence. The Scallop Festival has been going on for 45 years. Sometimes it was in the Armory, sometimes in the big tent by the old Playland location, sometimes on the military base, and- until now- in Buzzards Bay Park.

It is was a Bourne tradition. Now, the town is losing their Main Event, the annual gift horse that would fill the hotels, buy out the goods from our stores, and put our gas stations on a paying basis.

Who knows? Some of the people who visited Buzzards Bay during the Festival may have liked it enough to maybe return again and spend more money. We'll never know now, will we?

All summer long, people heading to spend money in other Cape Cod towns clutter up Bourne during any time period you can hang "commute" off of. We're asked to deal with it, so that Eastham and Martha's Vineyard can prosper. We get very little in return for it, other than some people who tire of the traffic enough to pull off of the highway in search of food or gasoline.

The Festival has always been a sort of the last hurrah for Cape Cod's summer, especially when the event coincided with the October scallop harvest. It was fitting that Bourne got the final bow with her Scallop Festival. We took the brunt of the hassle all summer long, so it was only right that we got the last bite out of the tourists before the desolation of winter set in.

The festival was kind of like a Thank You from all the people who had been leaning on Bourne during the peak traffic season, and the town was dependent upon it. Now, they take even THAT away from us. Oh, well, there will be another Canaliversary in 98.75 years, I guess we'll be OK.

Others are not so forgiving. Homeland Security has been tracking a group called Al-Mollusk, who were planning to disrupt the Faux Falmouth Festival. They had an elaborate plan to buy junker cars and use them to block the Bourne Bridge during the festival, depriving Falmouth of anyone Inland while seeing how many Cape Codders will travel through a mob to get scallops and fries.

The town considered her own measures. The big idea was to host an Oyster Festival on the same night. Advertising was to focus heavily on the aphrodisiacal properties of the Oyster, while disparaging the scallop scarfer. "You can go to the Scallop Festival, but if you still love your spouse, you'll be in Bourne instead."

Yeah, we were gonna go right for the friggin' jugular, you really have to these days.

Bourne took it on the chin with this Scalloping of our tradition, and we should already be planning our revenge. If this were the old days, we'd be sending guys across the bridge to burn down their salt mill and deflower their virgins. Those people are lucky that I don't run Bourne, I'd drop those two bridges into the water faster than you can say "Jackie Robinson." I'd try to steal their stupid Road Race.

I can tell you this.... you won't be seeing many people from Bourne down at the Fairgrounds this weekend. It's never nice to see your ex with someone else, especially if they are being fed shellfish.

Southeastern Massachusetts High School Football Schedule And Selections, 9/25-9/26

The author is working on very little sleep, so double check the schedules with a second source before heading out...

Marshfield at Dennis-Yarmouth, 6 PM

Marshfield appears to be taking no shorts this autumn.

Vegas, 31-18


Coyle-Cassidy at Martha's Vineyard, 6:30 PM

Big storm could be offshore... C-Ceasickness and C-Cancellation are possibilities

MV, 13-10


Silver Lake at Whitman-Hanson, 7 PM

Silver Lake is fighting for win #1, but that may not be happening.

W-H, 36-21



Xaverian at Barnstable, 7 PM

Barney is off to a rough start, losing 61-6 or so last week to BC High. Xaverian is just what the doctor ordered. Unfortunately, it was Dr. Mengele.

Xaverian, 48-20


New Bedford at Bridgewater-Raynham, 7 PM

Both teams have Ls on their record, but they were all to impressive teams.

B-R, 21-20



Quincy vs. Plymouth North, 7 PM

Listed as "neutral site" on MaxPreps for some reason, perhaps because they're playing on a neutral site or something. If someone knows, hit me up in the comments.

PN, 20-14


Bishop Feehan at Falmouth, 7 PM

The schedule I'm using also has Bishop Feehan vs Falmouth Academy, I'm not sure if it's the same game or not. I usually use the Globe's schedule, but I've used up my free site visits this month, and, well, eff them. The Globe, not the kids.

Falmouth, 21-19


Scituate at Plymouth South, 7 PM

Two undefeated Plymouth teams colliding at Thanksgiving should be nationally televised.

PS, 28-17


Upper Cape Tech at Bourne, 7 PM

Sandwich Road isn't big enough for two high schools, which is why I think Bourne High is off Trowbridge Road, home of the fabulous Trowbridge Tavern. Boy, oh, boy, did I see Bourne get tuned up by Martha last Friday.... yikes.

Bourne, 28-27



Cardinal Spellman at Weston, 7 PM

Weston is nowhere near Easton, and that will cost them when I make up random scores for these games.

Spellman, 41-10


Hull at Cohasset, 7 PM

If this was a Hull home game, I'd go watch it if I thought there'd be some nice surf in the background for my photos. I'd climb up on top of the friggin' announcers' booth if I had to, don't you even question it.

Cohasset, 28-10



Seekonk at Dighton-Rehoboth, 7 PM

The school's in Dighton, I found out.... North Dighton, to be precise. I'm not sure what differences exist between Dighton and North Dighton, but one of them is a high school with a football field.

D-R, 14-13


Greater New Bedford vs Dartmouth

Because we love irony, we'll point out that Greater New Bedford is a much smaller school than regular New Bedford is.

Dartmouth, 20-7


Duxbury at Hingham, 7 PM

Duxbury lost to friggin' Hollister last Friday, and if you asked me ten days ago, I would have told you that Hollister was a type of sweatshirt that teenage girls wear.

Duxbury, 34-28


Case at Wareham, 7 PM

Case is in Swansea, in case you're curious. Whenever I write about Swansea, I inexplicably want a TV dinner after.

You don't step to the 'Ham on Friday... you just don't.

?ham, 21-20



North Quincy at Hanover, 7 PM

Hangover!

Hanover, 14-12



Old Rochester at Apponequet, 7 PM

Somebody has to win...

Apponequet, 17-13


Southeastern vs Bristol-Plymouth, 7 PM

If the right people ran Bristol-Plymouth, they'd reverse the order of the team name every time they lost. One week they're Bristol-Plymouth, one week they're Plymouth-Bristol.... OK, the idea sucks.

Southeastern, 14-10


Durfee at Fairhaven, 7 PM

Fairhaven's one win came in an 8-6 shootout.

Durfee, 20-19


Middleboro at Pembroke, 7 PM

I'm very stubborn about spelling "Middleboro" like that. The other way reads like you coughed it out or something. Max Preps has this also listed as a Saturday game, so plan more carefully.

Middleboro, 20-13


East Bridgewater at Rockland, 7 PM

Eastie has a couple of impressive wins, but they get a test with 30 Rock.

EB, 28-27


Bishop Stang at Somerset-Berkley, 7 PM

In honor of the Pope's visit, I'm ascribing superpowers to the Catholic schools.

Stank, 30-17



Blue Hills at Diman, 7 PM

I'm not sure- OK, I have no idea- how "Diman" is pronounced. I suppose it's sort of like "the man," as it would otherwise sound like "demon"... and we may be writing about a Catholic school here, player.

Blueberry Hills, 17-14



Catholic Memorial at Brockton, 7 PM

CM beat Hartford, but it was Hartford, Vermont. I think they may have also pinned Duxbury pretty badly in the preseason, too.

CM, 28-24


Sandwich at Nauset, 7 PM

They have a perfectly good mascot already (I think it's a Dolphin, not really sure), but "Nauset Nausea" would be a fine and intimidating team name. Some sort of Pop Warner or Cape League team should take that name, as long as they remember to cut the Idea Man in on the payoff. I've got needs, my friend...

Sandwich, 17-12



Carver at Mashpee, 7 PM

Tough call.

Mashpee, 20-19



SATURDAY

Tri-County vs Bishop Connolly-Westport, 7 TBD (sorry)

"Bishop Connolly-Westport" sounds like one of those Rodham-Clinton hyphenated married names, which is a funny name to see hanging off a Bishop.

BCW, 24-21


Old Colony Voke vs South Shore Tech, 11 AM

They're both actually Voke Techs, but I essentially split two aces. SSVT is in Hanover, if you're on the away team.

OC, 13-12


West Bridgewater at Sacred Heart (Kingston), 11 AM

The WB might get lost negotiating the Kingston boondocks. Otherwise, 3 TD rout.

WB, 28-7


Cape Cod Tech at Monomoy, 1 PM

I want to see what Monomoy''s helmet looks like just badly enough to not drive out there for a game. Maybe they play Bourne later, hopefully at home. If the right people were running Monomoy, they'd have a shark tank in one or both of the end zones. It's not like they don't have a thucking fousand of them out there or anything...

Monomoy, 31-13


Buckingham, Browne and Nichols at Tabor, 1 PM

I may be wrong on the Nicks part, but wasn't Buckingham, Browne and Nichols three quarters of Fleetwood Mac?

BBN, 30-19


Holbrook/Avon at Nantucket, 5 PM

Two on one! No fair!

Nanny, 38-10


Randolph at Abington, 6 PM

Abby is always rock solid.

Abington, 21-14


Marian-Keefe Tech vs St. John Paul II, 7 PM

Not sure where they're playing this.

STJP2, 21-10