Showing posts with label fall river. Show all posts
Showing posts with label fall river. Show all posts

Friday, June 24, 2016

So Many Nature Shots, You May Turn Against Nature And Kick A Puppy

S'up?


We're emptying our Photobucket onto this website in a blizzard of archives articles. Today, we're doing Nature. This is from the Cape Cod Canal.


Plus-size lobster, courtesy of my friend Tornado up in Maine.



 A baby coyote, from Widow's Walk golf course in Scituate.


Second pic in a row from my man Ghost, this is what I believe is a New London, NH snapping turtle.



A bear paw print (next to the author's size 15 Reebok footprint), White Cliffs Country Club, Cedarville MA, courtesy of Hacksaw and his baby sidekick, Roo.


A couple of ducks or something, Barnstable MA



Buzzards Bay Bluejay



5 rescue cats I took in, Mom (#6) not included. I'm no cat lady, I was doing an Adopt A Pet column for a Cape Cod newspaper, and they had new homes quickly enough. They were all given political names when I had them... Republicat is off to the right, as she's supposed to be. On the left, from bottom to top, are Democat, Romneycat, Obamacat (facing left, of course) and Puffy Cat. Puffy Cat was very puffy, so no other name was going to work. My neighbor, who is conservative, took Obamacat (so named because he has a big O in his flank fur) and renamed it something. Puffy Cat went to my friend's girlfriend, and Democat went to some high school girl that the guy who used to sell me my weed knew. I kept Republicat and her Mom, and Republicat was then renamed Bay Bay Cat.


Bruschi the Bulldog, who hails from Wareham.



Grazing Fields Farm, Bournedale MA



My good ol' Border Collie, the late Sloppy Dogg.


Mid-flight seagull, somewhere on Cape Cod



Powder Point, Duxbury MA



Ten year old picture of a seal sunning himself on Duxbury Beach... just in case the shark stories make you think that the seals are new arrivals.


The author and a Mako Shark he caught.... OK, the author and a Mako Shark that his more manly friend caught and brought into Green Harbor. I'd have slapped the shark once and let him go, personally.  I think the shark was sold to a company in Japan, they got like $500 for him.


I did almost catch these gooses, but they gave me the slip. One of the quirks of this website is that the proprietor prefers to say "gooses" rather than the less-cute "geese." 



If you shot them with a potato launcher, you'd have the makings of a pretty good meal here...


"Snake in the grass, I see ya comin'..... from a mile away, I start gunnin'....."


Having a Weymouth black cat cross your path on Halloween is about as bad luck as you can get...


...unless, of course, you end up having a black cat cross your path that same day while you are at the Lizzie Borden house. You people should appreciate the risks that I take to bring you this column.

Once Thanksgiving passes, the turkeys get all cocky and strut around in your yard.


A seagull fighting a nor'easter, Duxbury Beach MA


Horsing around, Middleboro MA


Plimoth Plantation





Thursday, May 19, 2016

Most Ghetto, Southeastern Massachusetts Edition

New Bedford

Eastern Massachusetts is not without her faults. However, one thing we are not is Ghetto.

Granted, we have Fall River. You can get the Fear nice and easy in Fall River. It's a tough town. Most famous resident? An axe-murderess. Most beloved? Probably the same girl.

Taunton, Brockton and New Beddy are no walk in the park, either... or they're a walk in the park where you get beaten up by a gang of thugs for no reason. After that, there is what skiers call a precipitous drop-off.

Some of the tougher parts of our region aren't THAT tough. I'm not taking about individual citizens. I'm sure there's at least one bad-ass Kennedy (found him!) drawing breath somewhere, and you can get beaten up at the Bia Bistro in Cohasset just as badly as you can get handled at a Fall River Popeye's if you cross the wrong opponent.

Still, if you put on NWA and drive around Brockton, it sort of makes sense as long as your eyes don't go to the rear view mirror at the wrong angle. Try going down King Caesar Road in Duxbury with Bring The Ruckus playing. Your own silliness might strangle you.

There's nothing wrong with this. "Escaping an urban nightmare" is a top reason for moving out to the countryside. "Good visual environment for my Nasty Nas CD" isn't.

Still, if someone establishes a scale for Ghetto, and if the numbers on that scale can be applied to any town anywhere, you can rank towns with it. Lo and behold, that's just what someone did.

They used a simple formula.

Ghetto Bird
Household income levels
High school graduation rates
Number of convenience stores
Number of drug stores
Number of discount stores
Crime
Twitter mentions of #ghetto

It's a flawed formula, but it should be fun to play with.

Here's their Top 15:

Lawrence
Springfield
Chelsea
New_Bedford
Brockton
Holyoke
Lynn
Lowell
Fall River
Worcester
Everett
Revere
Boston
Fitchburg
Wareham
Wareham

Wareham is sort of the WTF on this list, IMHO. I feel badly knowing that she'll be 4th once I start a whittlin' everything North and West of Bristol and Plymouth County out of the master list.

There are definitely some flawed criteria. Twitter references are worrisome. I was a teacher for a while, and I heard kids describe every town on earth as "ghetto." Kids own Twitter, I suppose, and may lack the seasoning to know True Ghetto and why Whitman-Hanson isn't it.

They say that they use "5000 residents" as a cutoff point. Yet, I don't see Duxbury or Bourne or Marshfield or a dozen other towns with populations over 5K. If its a typo and the number is suposed to be 50,000 residents, why is Wareham there?

I was very much looking forward to the bottom of this list, as I wanted to see how the silver-spoon towns fared against each other. It'd be fun to imagine a couple of stockbrokers arguing about whether Cohasset is more thugged out than Sandwich. Alas, the list plays out before we get to the Blue Bloods.

The convenience store angle seems to be ranked right up there with Poverty and Crime, which would to throw a wrench into things. I think that if a Cumby's opens up near the Tedeschi's in your cow town, it shouldn't suddenly make you more Gangsta than someone from Lowell.

Straight Outta Hingham!

However, only my love of Wareham and the lower ranking of Boston makes me really have any issue with the Top 15.

I may get a bit of static from my readers, and I just ask them to remember that I am merely passing along the information on this list. I'm not smart enough to factor that many variables into an equation, even with My Damned Aunt Sally helping. I am smart enough to take a Top 100 list and chop it down to just show the towns in our region, and that's just what we're about to do.
Fall River

Regional Rank  City   Crime Score Original Rank

1) new_bedford 161.7 4
2) brockton 146 5
3) fall_river 190.3 9
4) boston 155.6 13
5) wareham 115.4     14
6) quincy 169.1 26
7) taunton 143.5 33

Well, maybe they have some points after all. Some people might flip Fall River and New Bedford, Most people might see the flaws in not having Boston as the anchorman. Larger towns suffer a bit in the ratings, as the sheer number of people make for lower rates.

Wareham seems to be ranked too highly, but maybe they just try really hard. I worked Boston in mostly to knock the 'Ham down a spot.

Our coverage area showed well, taking 4 of the top 14 spots.

Now, remember when I said "precipitous drop-off" earlier. Here we are!

bridgewater 172.5 39
west_yarmouth 124 41
attleboro 116 42
middleborough_center 154.3 43
fairhaven 117.3 46
barnstable_town 168.1 48
plymouth 149.9 52

I went to college in Bridgewater, and it's more bucolic than ghetto. A great bit of the town is structured around the fact that there is a college in town. The college is not the only entity in town that may be weakening the stock. As someone on a Bridgewater Facebook page said, "The nuthouse down the road lowers our ratings, as does the mental hospital."

Just kidding, I went to BSC. Class of 2000, blogga!

West Yarmouth? How? Ah, 5% margin of error and all.

Plymouth and Barnstable have their rotten parts, but rarely would one fear to stroll through them. They do the service of grouping their poor into certain areas. Bourne is good at that, too. They stash them right by the highway.

Kingston

weymouth_town 152.8 59
middleborough 69.3 60
nantucket 115.8 61
east_falmouth 149.7 64
foxborough 62.9 64
south_yarmouth 105.9 66
kingston 80.3 69

Foxboro is plummeting down the list now that Aaron Hernandez Inc. is within the system. They should sign Greg Hardy.

I wonder if Nantucket is America's most ghetto island? I suppose that Long Island has them beat.

I have no idea what Kingston is doing there, unless the guy who made the list counted Halifax and Plympton's dropouts from Silver Lake as all being from Kingston.

yarmouth 136.5 76
mashpee 115.7 77
somerset 154.1 78
abington 85.9 78
hull 166.3 81
harwich 71.8 83
rockland 112.4 88
mansfield_center 49.4 96

We're really reaching here, and I sort of understand why the list gets cut off where it does.

Conspicuous in their absence....

Sandwich
Marshfield
Chatham
Halifax
Rochester
Scituate
Carver
Hanover
Whitman
Cohasset
Duxbury
Duxbury

Content Reblogged from roadsnacks.net

Saturday, May 7, 2016

Iconic Regional Businesses: South Coast

Be sure to check our SOUTH SHORE and CAPE COD versions of this article. Same into, different businesses.
Life has bounced me from Boston to Quincy to Duxbury to Worcester (back) to Duxbury to Monponsett to Cape Motherlovin' Cod. I've seen them come and go, friend.

One thing that I noticed as I hopped around was that some business chains I got used to in one spot would either not exist in another spot, or some other product in the same field would be dominant in this new region.

I'd also see businesses that started in one spot springing up everywhere. That's always nice to see, especially with something you grew up loving... it sort of affirms your sense of good taste for you.

One other phenomena I'd see is that, while my friends and I might favor one particular local place or another, we'd have a regional default option. To use an example with a powerful business not born of these parts... we both might want a burger. I like Schmuckburgers over on Main Street. You like Ye Olde Slaughtered Cow on the State Road. However, there's always McDonald's.

Massachusetts is a funny place. We like things a certain way. There is an impressive list of otherwise nationally prosperous franchises who flop in Massachusetts. Pizza Hut, Papa John, Little Caesar and Domino's all struggle in Massachusetts, as locals often prefer their town's House Of Pizza. Locals laugh, especially near the coast, if you ask where the Red Lobster is. You might get punched, especially in Italian neighborhoods, if you ask where The Olive Garden is. IHOP and Krispy Kreme may be the biggest names crossed off of the Dunkin' Donut's hit list.

Today, we shall examine a few businesses which have that sort of regional recognition. Some people explore the world. Some people explore regions of it. If you are a regional tourist, look at this as a part of Bucket List. You should be familiar with all of these businesses we are about to discuss, You can get your Local card pulled, otherwise.

Someone who never went to the Cape as a kid might not know the Thompson's Clam Bar jingle, while someone from Harwich might think that Peaceful Meadows is a pet cemetery. View these places as a sort of Mendoza Line. Thompson's never expanded regionally, and Peaceful Meadows might be an ounce of Swagger away from being listed down below.

I broke this list up by Barnstable/Plymouth/Bristol County, although it could very easily be Cape Cod/South Shore/South Coast. I had to stretch up to Mansfield to fatten the South Coast category, but it's still Bristol, babe.

Here we go...


Bristol County

Honey Dew Donuts

Honey Dew and Marylou's make a tough dollar fighting for coffee sales (Honey Dew doubles down by going after the donut market, too) on the home turf of Double D. Honey Dew has fought hard enough to scatter 165 locations around Massachusetts.

They started in Mansfield, are now based in Plainville, and they own interior Bristol County. They have done a very good job of establishing themselves in Boston. Dunkin' kicks the spit out of them, but the people who like Honey Dew better are a loyal and dedicated bunch.

You can survive quite nicely like that, especially if you make a decidedly different donut than Double D does.

No one said it was easy, but Honey Dew is faring well enough for themselves. I want to see them cross paths with Marylou's somewhere, just to see who wins.


Gaspar's

Gaspar's is the largest manufacturer of Portuguese smoked sausage in the USA. Most of this is via their sales of Linguica and Chourico.

They have been whipping out the sausage for 4 generations from their Meat Mecca on Faunce Corner Road in North Dartmouth. They started in 1923.

Linguica is smoked sausage, made from smoke-cured pork, garlic and paprika. It is the go-to meal for any Portuguese person, but white people can shovel it down, too.

In Brazil, it is served with rice and beans. In Massachusetts, it is generally sliced open and grilled.

IMHO, it's the best pizza topping.


Minerva

You could very easily scratch out "Minerva" from the heading, fill in "Rose & Vickie's" or "Venus Cafe" and pretty much tell the exact same story. Someone of Southern European heritage starts a pizza joint, has some luck, wins over the locals and expands somewhere in the region.

Minerva started out in 1969, in Wareham. They carved out a nice niche serving Wareham, Onset and Marion. They expanded west, into Fall River, and east, into the Cedarville section of Plymouth.

Rose & Vickie's has Manomet, Cedarville and Marion. The Venus chain, which numbers all of their franchises other than the original Venus Cafe in Whitman, also has the Venus II in Brant Rock and Venus III in Hanson.

I have friends who eat 7 meals a week easy out of the Cedarville Minerva. They eat enough that their dog, Joe Biden, has grown accustomed to it. He eats enough of it that we re-named him "Joey Takeout."

"Joey Takeout" sort of morphed into a joke among my friends and I, and we work Joey Takeout references into our phone conversations... always with ominous overtones that are funny if you know that Joey Takeout is a ragamuffin Shih-Tzu dog and not the dangerous Sicilian mobster who we make him out to be.

Granted, this is a lot funnier if you have reason to believe that the police are tapping your phone. Somewhere in Plymouth, there is a police file on a non-existent gangster with transcripts like "Joey Takeout gets a bite out of everything coming into the White Cliffs."

Titleist

Golfers know all about Titleist golf balls, which enjoy a fine reputation among golfers and have been spoken for by many of the great ones.

Titleist got started just like every other business did, even yours... a MIT grad missed a putt, blamed the ball, had his dentist friend X-Ray the ball, and then transitioned a rubber-making company into golf ball production factory. They did $1 billion in sales in 2003.

Titleist, originally the Acushnet Process Company or something like that, is now based in Fairhaven. Staying true to their Original Recipe, every single ball made by Titleist is X-Rayed to ensure that the center is balanced.

The cursive "Titleist" logo scrawl on the golf balls belongs to Helen Robinson. She was a secretary for the Acushnet Company who was known for her exquisite penmanship. They gave her a pen and a scrap of paper, she hit it in one take, and her writing has appeared on every single product that the company has produced ever since. Her writing has appeared on more balls than Jasmine St. Claire.

I think that this is Helen Robinson. She looks like she was about to get taken off to see the Wizard.


Trucchi's

William Trucchi opened a supermarket off Tremont Street in Taunton with $500 that he borrowed from his parents. The Great Depression went down shortly after, but Italian grocers don't get Depressed! Especially in Taunton!

They have six stores scattered from Taunton to West Bridgewater to Abington to Middleboro to New Beffuh.

This is no mean feat in this age where a Super Wally opens down the road and every business nearby dies.

Angelo's, A&P, Shaw's, Star, Purity Supreme... supermarkets come and go, change names, and all sorts of stuff. Trucchi's keeps trucking along.


Fishing

The port of New Bedford is America's leading fishing port, with landings valued at $369 million. They have 30 wholesale processing plants, and employ 4400 people.

New Bedford lands 117 million pounds of product, including 50 million pounds of scallops. During the height of the season, 500,000 pounds of scallops move through New Beddy in a day.

Gloucester has the Gorton's Fisherman and the George Clooney movie, but New Bedford has the money. The port, and the economic activity associated with it, haul in $1 billion a year.

New Bedford has whatever you need to get fishing done. New Beige has chandlers, ice houses, welders, net designers, boatyards, gear builders, engineers, maritime attorneys, insurance brokers, settlement houses and every other conceivable shoreside marine support business.

They also have pretty girls hanging around the docks while we were shooting.


Friday, November 20, 2015

The Pilgrim Curse: Expanding The Bridgewater Triangle

Are We Living In America's Epicenter Of Evil?

The first Thanksgiving was a positive experience. People from different cultures got together for a celebration. No one killed each other, and English/Wampanoag relations never looked better.

One group of diners were the locals, the people who had roamed Plimoth for thousands of years.The others were the newcomers, who chose to share their first good harvest with the people who helped them survive their first winter. Gods were thanked, bread was broken, and a good time was had by all.

Massasoit Ousamequin was the Man at that dinner. Someone else hosted, but only Massasoit's will kept the first Thanksgiving from being the Plimoth Massacre and maybe Roanoke II. Massasoit not only spared the vulnerable Pilgrims, but he helped them survive their first Starving Time.

Stuff then, as tends to be the case over the years with relations between two groups of people, happened.

55 years after this first Thanksgiving, Massasoit's son returned to Plimoth. He didn't come in peace... he came in pieces. His head went up on a stake for 20 years, and the Plimoth children may have even played soccer with it now and then.

In between these two visits to Plimoth by Wampanoag sachems, a whole bunch of mess went down. That, in itself, is a story for the ages. But the drama went on long after the end of King Phillip's War.

I'm not the man to tell you that Jesus God is better than Wampanoag God. I can't tell you if the Gods favored one side more than the other. All I can tell you is that, ever since the deal went down, the whole region has been a little bit strange. I'm not the only one who thinks so.

It's a long story, with a lot of proof to be given. The short version is that the land we walk on today might be cursed. We'll get back to the curse in a minute, but let's go through some of the results of this curse first.

This story owes a huge debt to a man named Loren Coleman. Mr. Coleman is a folklorist, a television personality, an author and the owner of the International Cryptozoology Museum in Portland, Maine.

He is also the guy who invented the Bridgewater Triangle. This theory claims that there is heightened paranormal activity in a wedge-shaped area running roughly between Abington, Rehoboth and Freetown.

It's a take-off on the Bermuda Triangle story, but very different in character.

This area has been host to UFO sightings, Bigfoot encounters, reports of giant snakes, travelers mystified by orbs of light, children brought to tears by spotting birds that could carry them off, parents on the watch for evil clowns and scores of other spooky situations.

This terrifying Triangle lays in a dismal, sparsely populated region of Eastern Massachusetts. It is almost entirely rural in nature, based in the Hockomock ("where the spirits dwell") Swamp.

Even in a state with very high population density, people are few and far between in the Bridgewater Triangle.  If you aren't from the Bridgewater Triangle, you don't go into the Bridgewater Triangle.

This is even more true after the sun sets...

Not to differ with the guy who invented the theory and did all of my research for me already, but I think that Loren Coleman made a crucial mistake when he decided on the parameters of his Triangle. Sportswriters shouldn't disagree with guys who own cryptozoological museums on cryptozoological matters unless they feel that they have unbeatable proof, and, well, here I am.

Loren's error came when he drew the borders. He didn't think Big.

New England itself is a strange place. It's as old as anything in the country, and much older than most of it. We had ghost stories that were over 200 years old before anyone even thought about founding Seattle. Dogtown, Massachusetts was founded, lived in, abandoned and haunted before we got around to adding Texas or Michigan to the flag stars.

We have several sorts of spooky. We have the sea monsters and shipwrecks covered, we have the haunted woods thing down, and you don't want to go near our mountains.

Coleman's version of the Triangle covers several towns. It should cover several states.

I say this simply because the stuff outside of the Triangle is worse than the stuff in the Triangle. Once you even start looking over the respective Players, you realize that the current Bridgewater Triangle is actually a safe area that you'd want to seek refuge in once you started tallying up the Spookiness that exists just outside of her borders.

The Bridgwater Triangle's main weakness is that it isn't really known for anything distinct. The biggest name you see on her roster is Bigfoot, who belongs spiritually to a whole other coast. The Triangle isn't really even the scary epicenter of Massachusetts, a title that goes- in a rout- to Salem.

Perhaps the Triangle rules on a per capita basis, as it runs through the sparsely populated backwaters of Plymouth and Bristol Counties. However, even someone bringing straight disrespeck couldn't argue that the Triangle wouldn't hold her own as a part of a larger spooky region.

Let's redefine that region so that the scary parts are actually included in the scary part.


Taking the Triangle to the Southwest immediately solves the Celebrity problem, and I mean taking it ten miles Southwest. That brings us into Fall River, and we all know who the First Lady of Fall River is.

Even if you want to disqualify Lizzie Borden for being non-paranormal, her house still stands today, and people say it's haunted. She's also just the top dog in a crowded pound.

Fall River, and her sister city New Bedford, have the worst crime rates in Massachusetts. New Bedford and her hinterlands had a never-captured serial killer, as well as the tavern that the Jodie Foster movie was about. America's first Giant Monster story began in New Bedford. Fall River, not to be outdone, had a Satanic cult to keep up the evil after Lizzie Borden died.

Fall River would make a nice corner of an expanded Triangle, and you could make a fierce argument to keep the Triangle in Massachusetts, but that would leave out Rhode Island.

Rhodey represents hard. She's a little state, but she has two very spooky incidents in her past.

One of these is ultra-paranormal. In 1892 (yes, 1892), the farm regions of southern Rhode Island succumbed to vampire fever. The Brown family suffered a series of consumption (tuberculosis) deaths, with one of the victims reporting having been visited by her deceased sister Mercy during the night.

Mercy and her sisters were dug up, and- lo and behold- Mercy Brown didn't look that bad. Her nails and teeth seemed to have grown, and was that blood in her mouth? The locals didn't quite process that bodies can be preserved in cold, that nails and teeth will appear to grow as skin decays, and so forth.

Mercy got the full vampire treatment. Her heart was removed, torched on a rock that is still there today (Exeter, RI), and the ashes were fed to her ailing brother, who soon after died of consumption.

Remember, this was about 200 years after the Salem Witch Trials, about 10 years before the Wright Brothers got a plane in the air and less than 20 years before Ronald Reagan was born.

If vampires don't spill enough blood for your liking, Rhodey was also the host for several crucial sections of King Phillip's War, the bloodiest per person war in US history.

The Great Swamp Fight went down in South Kingstown, R.I. in December of 1675. The colonial militia were led to a five acre fort where the Narragansett tribe was based. Attacking across a frozen swamp, they caught the Narragansett tribe slipping, and they burned the fort to the ground.

Women, children and elderly were slaughtered, and the warriors- the only ones to escape the carnage- were forced to fall in with Metacom. Everyone else perished or was sold into slavery, and the battleground is said to be haunted.

AKA "the Great Swamp Massacre," it pretty much finished off the Narragansett as a force in New England. The tribe never gave up their identity, and gained federal recognition in 1983. If they get a casino, they may yet enjoy the last laugh.

Of course, the thesis of the article is that they got the last laugh via a curse, but we'll get to that. We first have a Triangle to redesign.

Rhode Island deserves the corner office, because, if a curse was uttered, it was most likely uttered in Rhode Island.

It may even have been uttered by Metacom, the eponymous King Phillip of the colonial war fame. He met his maker in a Mount Hope marsh known as Misery Swamp. He was drawn and quartered, and his head was displayed on a pike outside Plimoth for 20 years.

Things like state lines mean little to nearly-wiped-out Wampanoags, who would view them as just another lie the Other Man was telling. They also mean little to the Gods, who might be the ones who truly dole out the curses. There is no record of Metacom uttering a curse, but they also didn't have Twitter back then.

While giving Rhodey the corner office, I'd stretch the Triangle out past them into the sea.

The pointy part of our Triangle (I spent most of my last Geometry class staring at legs, and retained little technical vocabulary) would then hook East, towards Cape Cod and the islands of Martha's Vineyard and Nantucket.

Block Island Sound, Nantucket Sound and Cape Cod have a nautical history, and a nautical history generally includes lots of spooky stuff like ghost ships, buried treasure, false-light mooncussers, town-smashing storms, Nessie-looking sea monsters, bloodthirsty pirates and all-hands-lost shipwrecks.

Cape Cod sort of rules the roost, however. The white man's history here starts with what may have been a grave robbing, and it went downhill afterwards.

While paying respect to the Whydah shipwreck, the numerous British raids, the ship graveyard just offshore, Suicide Alley, the scores of ghosts/haunted houses, Captain Ahab, two leap-to-your-death bridges (ironically, the suicide launching pads that are the Bourne and Sagamore Bridges were both Great Depression projects), the hurricanes/nor'easters/blizzards and the Great White Shark population... the creepiest thing about Cape Cod would involve their most charismatic residents.

Cape Cod's most famous family is only here during the summer, and almost-but-not-all of their spooky stuff happened in places like Dallas and Los Angeles. However, their presence in Hyannis Port, much like the presence of Lizzie Borden in Fall River or Mercy Brown in Rhode Island, pretty much forces Cape Cod into any reasonable discussion of Massachusetts' stranger regions.

The Kennedy family are awash in murder, bootlegging, conspiracy theories and crashing various vehicles into various bodies of water. The family is widely believed to be cursed.

Check the list:

- JFK's murder is still America's greatest conspiracy theory

- RFK's murder is when you first started thinking "Curse."

- Old Man Kennedy was a sort of bootlegger, with ties to the mob.

- An older Kennedy (Joe II, maybe?) was killed in WWII.

- A wild Kennedy daughter was lobotomized and dumped in an institution.

- Ted drove his Presidential hopes off a Martha's Vineyard bridge.

- JFK Jr. and his perfect wife crashed a plane off of Martha's Vineyard.

The only curses that could rival the Kennedy Curse (which may be just a wealthy neighborhood part of the Pilgrim Curse) are the Tecumseh curse, the Von Erich curse, the Billy Goat curse, the Scottish Play curse and the former Curse Of The Bambino.


Cape Cod can also match the Triangle in Stones. The Triangle boasts Dighton Rock, Anawan Rock, and even the Devil's Footprint. They say that Plymouth also has a rock of some reputation.

The town of Bourne has two. One, pictured above, is Sacrifice Rock, aka Chamber Rock. This is where, according to legend, God used lightning to intervene in a pagan sacrifice, splitting the rock in the process.

The other famous rock in Bourne is the Bourne Stone, which has some unidentifiable scribbling on it. It may be Viking, it may be Wampanoag, it may have been a colonial goofing around and it may even be from a guy named Hanno The Navigator. At least one historian thinks that it says "A Proclamation. Of Annexation. Do Not Deface. By This, Hanno Takes Possession."

If that is what it really says, it means that an African (Hanno was from Carthage, and is also the guy who gave gorillas their English name... no mean feat for a guy who predates England) discovered America about 2000 years before Columbus found it, and about 500 years before Jesus drew breath. This interpretation is wildly contested, however.

It is funny to note that a stone which would basically tear the first few chapters out of any American History textbook is barely mentioned when discussing all of the other oddities in the area. It's also funny that the Bourne Stone isn't the most famous Rock in the area, or even the most famous carved-upon rock.

Bourne also has a haunted hotel, the Quality Inn (former Best Western), just off the Bourne Bridge.

At this point, we'd turn another corner on our Triangle and head NW... probably just in time, too.

Where you make the turn is up to some debate. It basically boils down to how much Ship Graveyard you want in the Triangle. I suppose that you could set it out where the Titanic sank if you wanted to, although a run of beach from Wellfleet to Truro alone has seen over a thousand shipwrecks. That should be enough for most folks.

A lot of our folklore is nautical, and this corner of the Triangle would be chock full of benthic beasties. As you round Cape Cod and head north through the sea, you'll encounter reports of sea serpents in Duxbury and Gloucester. The witness in the Duxbury case was no less than Daniel Webster. Hull also has a strong sea serpent history. Henry Hudson claimed to have seen a mermaid in our Triangle's area in 1609. Nantucket had a Globster. Truro had a Beast.

With Massachusetts being more of a nor'easter state than a hurricane state, the South Shore is where you get the more frequent storm damage. Generally, every winter has at least one bad storm, and you get a homewrecker every 20 years or so.... or every other year or so, if that global warming stuff is true.

As we come back onto the mainland after leaving Cape Cod, we get into Plymouth. Plymouth has a major role in this story, and we'll bring them back into the mix at the end.

The South Shore has no shortage of creepy history. A lot of the interior is in the Coleman version of the Triangle, and it would serve you better to let others discuss it. I always favored Kristen Good's work.

Offhand, I'd mention hauntings at the Phillips Mansion in Marshfield, the Sun Tavern in Duxbury, Cemetery Hill in Plymouth, Gurnet Light, the Jerusalem Road child statue in Cohasset, Hanover Town Hotel, Bear Cove Park in Hingham, the Marsh People of Wareham, Fort Warren and the Lady In Black from Hull, vanishing women (sometimes blue) strolling the shores of Onset, Duxbury and Sagamore Beaches, a second Sacrifice Rock in Plymouth near the Pine Hills, the USS Salem in Quincy, the First Cliff ghost ship off Scituate, and the Man In Black of Weymouth.

I would make sure that the revised Triangle avoids Boston, while perhaps cutting the edge close enough to include the Boston Harbor islands. Boston is sort of her own Triangle. I also purposefully avoid Providence.


It is important to touch land twice more. For starters, if your paranormal Triangle doesn't include Salem, your paranormal Triangle is whick-whick-whack. Moving it inland to Danvers gives us a better abandoned hospital than the one (in Hanson) in the picture above.

Salem has witches, witch trials, voodoo, hangings, mass hysteria, insanity, curses, and the Devil himself at times. No respectable Triangle could skip Gallows Hill.

To be honest, and I am guilty of it myself... any Massachusetts paranormal triangle that isn't named after and centered on Salem is sort of like putting Fredo in charge of the Corleone family.

Gloucester would also be an important player in the mix. Not only do they have a history of having their sons swallowed up by the sea, but they also have the strongest claim on a sea monster in New England (and perhaps American) history.

A run from Mattapoisett around Cape Cod and up to Boston would also give you all of Massachusetts' fatal (and, minus Nahant, non-fatal) shark attacks.

Salem, Danvers, Dogtown, Arkham and Gloucester could quite easily secede and form their own Triangle, but we'll keep them in this one as the Anchorman.

I apologize for the awful Triangle. Longtime readers may draw a connection between my inability to draw straight lines and the reason why Jessica takes all of the good pictures.

I run the Triangle up to Portland for a few reasons. For starters, a nice wide turn around Cape Cod covers most of the ship graveyard. Some of the worse ones were way offshore. You probably don't want to stretch it to the Lusitania wreck, but the wreck of the Portland (of Portland Gale fame) off of Gloucester might be a good spot for a border.

Running it up to Portland sort of Xs out New Hampshire, but that's the way the granite crumbles. They sort of lost their spot when the Old Man In The Mountains fell. New Hampshire does have some creepy stuff, but it my be under the thumb of the nearby Bennington Triangle. If I brought NH into it, I'd go with wherever the Hill family got "abducted."

We also sort of cut off western/central Massachusetts, Connecticut, Vermont and New York. This is costly, as it costs us Sleepy Hollow, the Amityville Horror, the house from A Haunting In Connecticut, a lot of King Phillip's War battleground, and the Dover Demon... who "most likely" wandered over from the nearby Bridgewater Triangle anyhow.


Maine is important for celebrity-type reasons. New England, and especially coastal New England, has a sea-lion's share of he horror market down. Movies, books, TV shows... to tie it to a running thesis in this article, we over-represent.

I have no intention of doing a Google search for this, because I'm pretty sure that I can come off the top of my head with a pretty good triangle list.

- Moby Dick starts in New Bedford and moves to Nantucket. Every guy with authority on the Pequod was from the expanded Triangle, and I think Ishmael was, too.

- I need to read me some more Lovecraft, but I'm pretty sure that his mythos has a coastal region around Salem.

- Hawthorne had a few spooky stories set in Salem, another reason Salem sort of carries the title belt here.

- I think the guy on The X Files was from Nantucket or Martha.

- The inclusion of Maine is, uhm, mainly done to include two very important people. One would be Stephen King, who is in enough people's nightmares to force the issue. His stomping ground is Maine. I think he may live in Lewiston, but he likes his privacy, and Portland is easier to use. I do think that Salem's Lot was set in the Falmouth/Cumberland area, so Portland is close enough.

Besides....


If I feel the need to alter some better researcher's Triangle, you sort of have to tip your hat to the man.

Why not end this expanded Triangle to the business of the Triangle Man himself, Loren Coleman? Draw that final corner of this Triangle right through the International Cryptozoology Museum in Portland, Maine.

This gives us a Triangle with points in Portland, the waters off Rhode Island and the open ocean off Cape Cod. It has elements of Coleman's inland, rural Triangle, while also adding elements from the more well-known Bermuda Triangle.

It is a large section of country, maybe a bit less than 10% of the New England land mass, with X amount of open ocean.

No other area really matches it. New York, as we mentioned, has a Sleepy Hollow/Amityville Horror mix, and NYC is always frightening. The Jersey Devil lives nearby, as does the Montauk Monster. Maryland holds her own with the Blair Witch and Edgar Allen Poe, but she sort of wears out when New England starts stacking more chips on the table.

Godzilla, King Kong, Rodan, the Cloverfield monster and every asteroid movie ever has attacked NYC. Hollywood shames Stephen King and Lovecraft. Cascadia has Bigfoot, and Vermont has Champ.

Still, my Triangle beats 'em, It might be on a per capita basis, like King Phillip's War, but it wins.

Speaking of which....

It's not fair to put the blame for casting the curse on the Wampanoags.

They were living in relative harmony before the Other Man arrived. I'm pretty sure that the Vikings killed a bunch of natives, and some of the first Euros to check out New England may have kidnapped some locals (this is how Squanto and Samoset learned their English). These explorers also coughed a bunch of European germs onto the locals, who- due to geographic isolation- had no natural resistance. This is why the perfectly useful port of Plimoth was empty when the English arrived.

The Wampanoags fared worse from the exchange than the English did, which makes it unlikely that they were the ones casting the Curse. The Wampanoag plague, which did the most damage to either side, went down probably 20 years before Metacom was even born. That sort of eliminates him from Curser status.

The plague also eliminates the Pilgrims- who arrived after a series of illnesses wiped out 90% of the local population- from contention, but "The Pilgrim Curse" just sounds cool, to be quite frank.

If you take the Vikings out of the equation, you can pretty much trace the source of the Curse- cast by either a tribal dissident opposed to the very first meeting of European and Native American, or by the Gods themselves- to some encounter between explorers/fishermen and the Wampanoags. Gosnold, Smith, Champlain and Hudson all worked the area, and they were followed by the more ballsy of the European fishermen.

Just for laughs, let's set the date to 1605, which is when Squanto, or Tisquantum, was kidnapped by Captain Weymouth. Weymouth, I might add, was an early and miserably failed colonial town that was briefly abandoned.

"Tisquantum" is a Wampanoag word for "divine rage." It was most likely not his real name. When he introduced himself to the English as Tisquantum, he was essentially a kidnapping victim saying "Englishmen, I am the wrath of God."

The English stabbed his people in the back anyhow. Perhaps Squanto, who had been exposed to European culture numerous (he sailed across the Atlantic six times with very superstitious sailors) times and may have had knowledge of curses, tried one out. Perhaps curses can work retroactively. Perhaps the gods saw it coming, and launched a pre-emptive strike on both sides.

The region has been strange ever since. Not many regions are stranger.

Fear the sunset in Cranberry County....